Time of Our Lives!

It’s a busy season and I have such good news to share!

(I feel that I need to talk quickly because I’m feeling that you’re in a “pre-pesach rush” mood). 

But listen: We actually HAVE more time than we think we do!! 

After I read “168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think” by Laura Vanderkam, I enjoyed how she explained how much time we really have when we are focused on using our time wisely. 

I’ll sum up the premise of the book for you…because I suspect that you think you don’t have the time to read it. 🤣

We allllll have 168 hours in our week. We have the same amount of time as roshei yeshiva, world leaders, partners in accounting firms... Get this: if you work 40 hours a week and sleep 8 hours a night, that’s only 96 hours. Which means you are still left with 72 hours a week! That’s a lot of time. A LOT of time to do what you want to do! How exciting is that?! 

The skill of time management is an executive functioning skill that some of us are awesome at, and some of us stink at. Ever run into a neighbor's house to grab an onion and find yourself leaving after a 45 minute conversation? Yes, so you probably stink at time management. You get distracted easily and that eats into your time and your ability to get things done in a timely manner. 

Vanderkam teaches that it's not that we don’t have time. It’s that (a) we spend our time on things that we prioritize and that (b) we waste some of our time on distractions. With this basic insight, we all can find the time to do whatever we want to do.

Often we use the “I don’t have time” excuse as a way of avoiding having to do something.  Sometimes we use the “I don't have time” excuse as a way to feel busier. And this is ironic and even funny – because it’s the busy people that find time for everything! The cliche “if you want to get something done, ask a busy person” is so true. Because busy people spend their time more efficiently. 

And they actually spend time doing what they want to spend time on! (Weirdos! Lol). 

Think of this example: If we had a packed day with no time for anything extra, and then G-d Forbid, we needed to take a child for stitches, we would obviously find the time. We figure it out. Yet if I would have asked you to go for lunch with me at the beginning of the week, chances are you would have told me that you don’t have the time! 

So, this newsletter is telling you that you actually have A LOT OF TIME! 72 hours a week (which is 3 full days!) and that’s outside of a 40 hour work week, and with sleeping 8 hours a night. 

To be as efficient as we can be, we need to calculate how much time we have in our day, and then plug in the most important things that need to get done.Then cut out things that are less important, and if we don’t have time, it’s ok - guilt free!

How cool is this? I knew you’ll thank me. 

Happy pre-pesach busy season! Go get a manicure and make sure to have self care. After all, you have the time! 

❤️, Shifi 

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Ok. Very important P.S.! My Note to anyone who can relate! (more like a diary entry)

Yikes. I need to say something very important! Here’s some bad news! This newsletter is a hoax! I wrote it last week before Purim and every day since then, I’ve been keenly aware of how I spend my time. And …like I said, Yikes!! There ain’t no extra 72 hours. 

Ok, here’s the thing. I read 168 hours a while ago and loved it so I decided to write about it. And I truly did learn to calculate my time a bit better. But, after focusing on it for a week, let’s be honest for a second: is the concept as true for Parents of Children? Or Anyone working full time who also has other responsibilities? So. Not!

Maybe for me it’s just been the last couple of days. But I think it’s more like “the last couple of decades” 😂. We can all agree that for those with children at home, our day starts when they go to school or start a nap. So let’s figure 9am-ish. But then, we totally need a half hour to unwind - because, from 7-9am, it’s just not about us! Then it’s work, exercise, self care, sick and well visits, errands, appointments, caring for parents and grandparents, grandchildren, making Simchos, and all the other tons of responsibilities. And then… BOOM! almost time for carpool! Or school bus, if you’re lucky. Or school bus with traffic getting home if you’re luckiest. Then checking in with parents and being a therapist to your kids, a caring spouse and the many other roles we play, etc etc —- soon it’s already bedtime. Actually, it's usually way past bedtime…And for singles there is an entirely different set of responsibilities surrounding work, school, friends and dating life that can be equally overwhelming.

Ahh! I’m no longer feeling that we have an extra 72 hours, Laura Vanderkam! 

So yes, for many of us, it’s just not quite the “extra” 72 extra hours a week that Laura refers to 🥴!

BUT, I think that this is the main point: We make the time for the people and responsibilities that are most important to us! And even if, in fact, we don’t have an extra 3 full days (or anything close to that) — we can all work on being more efficient by doing a better job of prioritizing what is most important to us. Right? Right!

If our Socially Appropriate-ish Family can now discover just an extra 4 minutes a day! That would be 28 newfound minutes a week.

Perfect amount of time for a nap! And who can’t use a nap? You’re welcome ❤️

Love, Yours Truly!